1. The Case for Nacho Cheese

by Wayne Wickman

The Nacho Cheese Dorito is the culmination of many culinary masterpieces. These chips offer an alternative to the messy and obnoxious Cheetos. If you want a simple but sophisticated flavor, nacho cheese Doritos are the only option. The support of Cool Ranch is the renouncing of faith and patriotism and joining a mental ward because you have gone insane.

While the cool ranch chip is flaky and awkwardly colorful like the strange people who eat them, the nacho chip has a dominant flavor and fiery color. Not only is the flavor better and visually more appealing, but the chip is also more inviting. Even the Doritos logo is made after the nacho cheese Doritos because the logo has the same coloring scheme as the nacho cheese flavor.

The nacho cheese Dorito seems more appetizing. The crunchy hills of flavor on the nacho cheese is of no comparison to the chip that looks like a four year old sucked the flavor off the chip and put it back in the bag. So if you enjoy failing your classes, by all means eat cool ranch, but if you want to be an absolute slayer then eat nacho cheese.

The delicious residue left on your finger after an empty bag only keeps giving. Although you may be sad, the nacho cheese provides a more prominent taste to your cheesy fingers than the mild cool ranch. Nacho cheese is the man of all chips whereas cool ranch is the kid who gets picked last in sports and fails Spanish.

The cool ranch only has one flavor while the nacho cheese expands to a greater variety of flavor.  There is the both the spicy nacho and the loaded nacho cheese, each variation providing even greater fulfillment to your hunger; through Mr. McMahon’s wide knowledge of food he should just admit that nacho cheese is better and if he doesn’t well he’s too far gone for modern medicine to help.

It is proven by the American public that the Nacho cheese flavor is better. Based on my own personal consumption and research, nacho cheese Doritos locos tacos, from Taco Bell, are rated higher than the cool ranch version. And those who disagree must either be too dumb to think or doesn’t have a tongue.

The widely debated argument has taken the world by storm. Even Mrs. Mundell recognizes the superiority of nacho cheese, saying, “I prefer nacho cheese over cool ranch.” There is no question. Nacho Cheese is the best flavor of Doritos on the market.

2. The Case for Cool Ranch

by Liam McMahon

For thousands of years, generations have debated what flavor of Dorito is better: Cool Ranch or Nacho Cheese.

Cool Ranch is the superior flavor of Dorito. Hands Down. Supporting Nacho Cheese is as punishable of an event as supporting communism. I do not understand how there is a debate between the two flavors.

“Cool Ranch is one of the most elegant chip flavors while Nacho Cheese makes me want to throw up,”

Cole Ross, junior

Nacho Cheese tastes like dog food. On the other hand, Cool Ranch tastes like heaven with a side Jesus. When I bite into my Cool Ranch chips, I am enlightened.

If you think that Nacho Cheese is better than, or just as good, as Cool Ranch, you have brought dishonor to your family. My counterpart somehow loves Nacho Cheese. Mr. Wickman was dropped on his head as a baby many times which is why he prefers this disgrace of a flavor. I feel sorry for the little guy. Seeing him suffer while eating such bland chips is heartbreaking.

I am a junior. I enjoy my time on top and my time on the bottom. Stay thirsty my friends.