Jamba Juice secret menu: heaven on earth awaits


by Joe Hittinger
Eagle Staff

With over 700 locations nationwide, Jamba Juice is one of the most popular destinations for smoothies.

While many fast food restaurants are fabled to have secret menus, none are as shrouded in mystery as the legendary Jamba Juice secret menu.

It is such a well-guarded secret that even some employees are not aware of its existence.

If you are tired of the regular old boring smoothie flavors, then trying the secret menu at Jamba Juice is a must.

The secret menu is smoothies that are not “healthy” enough to be advertised, as most of them were created by bored employees who experimented with different ingredients to make new, exciting flavors.

The most popular flavors eventually caught on and the recipes spread by word of mouth and through the Internet. For this reason, flavors vary from store to store.

The most popular flavors are Pink Star, which tastes very similar to Starburst candy, and the Hello Jesus, which is rumored to taste like freshly picked Australian blueberries blended to perfection.

While this secretive information is usually hard to come by, junior Wade Brill has the inside scoop.

“My girlfriend Addison started working at Jamba Juice this summer,” Brill said. “She told me about the secret menu right away, and since then I’ve been getting smoothies on the reg.”

Upon first finding out about the fabled secret menu, many people mistakenly rush in and simply demand a smoothie from the bewildered Jamba Juice employee.

However, there is an important process to go through to ensure the best possible outcome and avoid an embarrassing awkward moment with the entire store.

Plan ahead: know exactly what you are going to say when you enter the store.

It is probably a good idea to run through a few different scenarios in your head just in case something unexpected happens.

Once you enter the store, the most important thing to remember is to be cool. If you walk in there looking sketchy and uneasy, people might think something is up. Be confident while you wait in line to place an order.

Once it is your turn to order, step up to the counter and take a quick look around to make sure no one is standing too close. If someone is too close for comfort, shoot him a nasty look and he will undoubtedly back up a few steps.

Lean in and whisper quietly in the ear of the employee something along the lines of, “I’d like a smoothie off the secret menu.”

Since this underground menu is such a well-kept secret, the cashier will most likely be shocked that a smoothie civilian such as yourself has just uncovered the mystery.

Do not let this discourage you, though. If you have a certain flavor in mind from the secret menu, ask for it.

If not, you can ask the employee to give you a quick run through of the most popular flavors and you can choose from those.

After you have ordered your smoothie, all you have to do is wait in anticipation for the most exhilarating fruit smoothie experience of your life.