Saturday Detentions Cruel, Pointless


by Spencer Krumholz
Eagle Staff

We all hate them. We all do not want them. We all do not understand them. So what do we do with them?

Saturday detentions have haunted the halls of this year since day one.

The constant presence of Saturday detentions seeks to limit the bad behavior of all students.

But it makes one wonder if the consequence of Saturday detentions actually motivates those detention “frequent fliers” to behave better on campus.

New Dean of Students Tim Clarkson thinks that they do.

Saturday detentions are unnecessary. Students work too hard during the week to come to school on Saturday just for more work.

As a student in multiple activities on campus, I find the Saturday detentions to be quite a bother.

What the administration would argue is that they have made it difficult to receive a Saturday detention, but this is false.

They have not taken into consideration that some people have unlucky hours, days and weeks.

The most well-behaved student on campus may slip up a couple times throughout the week, but that does not mean that he deserves the hardship of a Saturday detention.

Take this for instance: a student does not put his phone in his backpack because he forgot but still received a detention. Then, the next day forgets to do his homework and receives another detention. On the third day, he gets a call from a telemarketer during class, gets his phone taken up and has to report to detention.

Sounds like a very unfortunate but very plausible series of events.

By this time, this well-behaved student now has to report to a Saturday detention.

Use of Saturday detentions is only necessary when the student has intentionally committed an act that is completely contrary to a campus value.

Dean Clarkson is no doubt a very wise man, and I trust that he uses good judgment when handing down this severe consequence.

For a student who receives a Saturday detention, I give you one piece of solid advice: do not miss it.

If you happen to underestimate the seriousness of the Dean of Students, prepare for a rude awakening.

Clarkson takes his job very seriously and will not stand for misbehavior and disrespect from any of the campus classes.

As long as Saturday detentions are in effect, every student on campus must pray every night that some silly mishap does not occur the next day that leads to having to show up on the weekend.